Finding Friendship

“Hey, Villette*!” I said when I saw my friend at church one Sabbath.
Villette just walked past me, staring straight ahead.

Huh, I thought. Why didn’t she say hi back? Maybe she didn’t hear me.

The next Sabbath, I was walking into the women’s restroom at church, and I saw Villette again.
“Hi Villette!” I said.
Again, Villette seemed to ignore me.

This is the second time she’s ignored me, I thought. Does she dislike me now?

What was going on with Villette?

Another Ignorant Friend

Later on, the following Sabbath rolled around. I saw my other friend Jade* talking to Rebecca*.
“Hi, Aleah!” Rebecca said cheerfully when she saw me.
“Hi!” I said to her. “Hi, Jade!”

Jade just coldly frowned at me.
I felt my face get hot with awkward embarrassment. Now what was going on with Jade?

“I guess I’ll see you later,” I said.
“Yeah, see you later, Aleah!” Rebecca said with a smile.
Jade just continued to stare at me with cold eyes.

The Real Problem

Several weeks later I finally confided to my mom about Villette and Jade’s cold and uncaring attitude against me.

Mom then said,
“Aleah, I understand how sad you feel about what Villette and Jade are doing to you,” she placed her arm around my shoulders. “But the problem is not them, the problem is your heart.”

At first I didn’t really get what Mom meant by that. I was too sad and too bitter over being ignored and rejected by my two so-called “friends” to really think about Mom’s statement.

I mean, at that time, I was honestly too wrapped up in my own selfishness and what I wanted to have in my life (i.e. a kind, close friend), to seriously consider what the REAL PROBLEM was in this whole situation of feeling socially ignored and rejected.

So, what was the REAL PROBLEM?

The Friend That I’ve Been Ignoring & Rejecting

Now looking back on that event in my life four years later, I’ve realized something. At that time, while Villette and Jade were ignoring me and rejecting me, I was also rejecting and ignoring another Friend.

You are My friends if you do whatever I command you. No longer do I call you servants, for a servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all things that I heard from My Father I have made known to you. (John 15:14-15)

In this verse, Jesus is saying that He sees His followers as His friends. Jesus saw me as His friend. But I ignored His friendship; I’ve rejected His love. I had vainly sought out love and happiness in being friends with Jade and Villette.
But it wasn’t until they ignored me and rejected me, I discovered the startling truth.

What is this startling truth?

A Different Dependence

The startling truth was that I was placing full dependence on Villette and Jade to give me love and happiness rather than depending on God to be my source of love and happiness.

And dear reader, maybe that’s your struggle today. You’be been probably–just like me–depending on someone to give you the love and happiness that only God can give you. Or maybe it’s an addiction you’ve been depending on to help you feel satisfied, happy, and loved.

Dear reader, if you sense the Holy Spirit convicting you today that you have–like me–been ignoring and rejecting the friendship Christ desires to share with you, and trying to find His love and His happiness in either people, entertainment, pleasure, drugs, or anything, I wanna appeal to you to pray the following prayer below:

I’d like to conclude this post with a beautiful quote from Ellen White in her book, Christian Service:

“Jesus is the friend of sinners; and His heart is touched with their woe.“

–{Christian service pg. 18

May each and every one of us make Christ our Ultimate Joy, our Ultimate Love, and our Ultimate Friend!
Amen! Maranatha!

---

*Names have been changed to protect identity